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Your Hall of Fame Ballot Lacks Pizzazz

Milwaukee Brewers v Atlanta Braves Photo by Mike Zarrilli/Getty Images

Baseball is in the middle Hall of Fame voting season, which is the time where some of the smartest minds in baseball to set their eyes on enshrining and honoring baseball’s legends. The Baseball Writers’ Association of America votes on up to ten (10) of the most qualified players to be honored to represent the greatest players to ever play the game. A great deal of debate has surrounded the voting process, but one thing is clear: the Hall of Fame voting process is boring, and there’s no better way to spice it up than by using your ballot to make your own statement and create some real buzz.

ABC’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live” - Season 17
Gonna tell my kids this is Derek Jeter

The most important thing to remember when you’re constructing your Hall of Fame ballot is when you’re supposed to protect the “sanctity of the Hall,” and when you are not. The prevailing rule among Hall voters is that when you’re considering whether an alleged or confirmed steroid user should be enshrined, the Baseball Hall of Fame is a shining beacon of the utmost sanctity, reserved for only the players who exhibit the greatest combination of athletic excellence and excellence in character, both on and off the field. When considering literally anyone else, go ahead and use your Hall ballot to make whatever sort of statement you want to make.

2019 BBWAA Awards Dinner
Honestly, is there a sporting event where Pitbull will not perform?

Need some of those precious Twitter interactions in order to pump your blog or podcast? Write in Wily Mo Pena as your only candidate and post a picture online. You’ll bump your numbers in no time. Do you find it entertaining to make a massive heel turn and irritate people? Vote 10 times for Brad Penny and spend the rest of the day arguing with people in the replies. Big fan of U2 and think they’re unfairly criticized on the internet, probably for that one time they gave free music to everyone and people got mad? Write in Bono as your tenth candidate and post a series of blogs and YouTube videos defending him. Sure, it has nothing to do with baseball, but who cares? This vote is your time to shine!

Perth Celebrity Sightings - November 2019
Cooperstown, where the streets have no name...
Photo by Faith Moran/GC Images

I’d even suggest that you take advantage of the opportunity to use the Hall of Fame vote to draw attention to some political causes as well. Just write whatever you want in the margins. If you need some cash, casually drop your Venmo on the ballot — you never know what might happen. The most important thing about Hall of Fame voting is shameless self-expression. We take HOF voting very seriously, until we don’t.

So, while I do not have a Hall of Fame vote, it is in this spirit that I would like to make the claim that Josh Beckett should be a Hall of Famer just for beating the Yankees in the 2003 World Series, that we should impeach Bobby Abreu, and that Scott Weiland should receive his posthumous induction. Everyone fight me.

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